The Reality of Dealing with Rejection

Life would be pretty amazing if we got whatever we wanted. Sadly, dealing with rejection is just part of the game.  From relationships to work, every aspect is filled with successes and rejections.

While avoiding every rejection that comes your way is impossible, you are able to control how you respond to it. By controlling your response, you set yourself up for better results next time around.

However, it’s important to point out dealing with rejection takes a lot of time and patience. In reality, it is a skill that many people struggle with.

Here are some tips to help get your through your next rejection:

Take a Second

It’s so incredibly easy to act on your gut reaction when you experience any type of rejection. Just, don’t do that. I can vouch from personal experience that it almost never works out in your favor.

Take a second, take a few deep breaths, and keep it together. Yes, you may want to scream, cry, yell, or argue…just don’t. It will be much more beneficial to take a step back and examine the situation.

Instead of going off your immediate reaction to being rejected, take a step back and work on responding with logic and a respectful attitude towards the person that rejected you.  It’s never good to add fuel to the flame and people will respond much more positively to you in future interactions.

If you have time and if the situation allows it. grab coffee, go take a walk, or talk to a friend that isn’t part of the situation to cool off.

dealing with rejection: use space to cool off

Take Time to Feel Your Emotions

Dealing with rejection means dealing with the negative emotions that come with it. Once you have a moment to breathe and to be alone, take inventory of your emotions. Rejection hurts and disregarding negative emotions that come up may come back to haunt you. 

Because of this, take time to feel any and all emotions that you may have. Sometimes we have the tendency to push them down and move forward. However, understanding your emotions and how that rejection makes you feel might provide deeper insight to why you were rejected in the first place.

Try using some self-care techniques to really focus on you and getting back to a healthy mindset before getting back out there!

Don’t Take Rejection Too Personally

Ok, sometimes being rejected is completely our fault.  However, 99 percent of the time, that isn’t the case. The fact is that there could be a million reasons outside of your control  on why things didn’t go your way.

Maybe your crush has a lot going on in their lives and can’t handle a relationship at the moment. Maybe that work promotion you were passed up for doesn’t have to do with your ability to perform your job, but has to do with the time you’ve been in the position.

The point is, there are many many reasons why people experience rejection. Not taking one hundred percent of the blame can help you understand other perspectives and reasons why this may have happens.

Deal with Rejection…Then Move on From it!

At the end of the day, you got rejected.  It happens to the best of us. Does it suck? Yes, completely. But should you sit around and dwell on it? No.

Not moving on from rejection will only set you up for more rejection. Yes, take time to get over the initial negative emotions that rejection brings with it, but at some point you will have to get up and get back out there.

In fact, one of the worst mistakes you could do is to have the one rejection you experienced keep you from getting back out there. Remember: You can’t set yourself up for success if you’re letting the fear of failure or rejection hold you back.

Reflect and Learn

Reflect on what happened (but don’t dwell) and gather lessons to take away from it. Learn from those lessons and use them to grow. Maybe you didn’t get what you wanted this time, but with the knowledge you gained from this experience, you will be better equipped to handle similar situations and opportunities.

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Key Takeaways:

  • Rejection is normal
  • Don’t let the fear of getting rejected keep you from chasing your goals, dreams, or desires
  • Don’t act on any gut emotions/reactions that come from getting rejected
  • Take time to feel your emotions
  • Don’t take rejection too personally
  • Move on from rejection and keep striving towards your goals
  • Reflect, learn, and grow from this set back

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